Sunday, December 23, 2007

Friday, December 21, 2007

For the first time in my life...

For the first time in my life, I made a donation to a Presidential Candidate. I sent Senator Biden $15. Yea, I know what you're thinking: Damn, Joe. Where do you get that kind of cash? (I had it in my car's cup holder, covered in soda. Thanks for asking!)

I also know you're wondering "Why Joe Biden?" And the answer to that is simple. He is flat out the only candidate on either side of the aisle who has a clue about how to solve the crisis in Iraq. It's not about Stay the Course, or Get out Now. It's about solving the problem properly so that when we leave the entire place doesn't impode.

All the rest of the major issues are almost secondary. Partly because both sides of the aisle are saying the same things about Immigration which is Big Issue #2, and I expect to see something happen no matter who gets into office.

As for the rest of the issues: Universal Healthcare, Education, etc., any policy put forth by the next administration is going to get completely watered down by Congress no matter who it is. So whether you like Obama's view on Education reform, or Huckabee's, do you REALLY think the final version of the legislation is going to look any different?

The #1 issue in front of us is Iraq. We must get out in a manner that leaves the country stable. If that doesn't happen the entire Middle East is going to end up in turmoil and the lasting ramifications to that are far more dangerous than anything we've seen in more than half a century. And only Biden has a solution.

(And if he doesn't win I'm going to want a refund!)

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

All in a morning's work

The alarm was set for 6:30am. Or I thought it was. I rolled over to look at the clock at 7:55am. It took a moment for both the time to register, and to remember why I slept so late. I was on the phone with K until almost 1am. But I digress.

I got up, walked into the bathroom, flipped on the shower, and sprayed the ceiling. I had forgotten that yesterday the showerhead had broken off. My shower has one of those nozzles that are on the end of a hose so you can take it down. Unfortunately the holder doesn't sit right so when the showerhead is in the holster it aims fairly horizontal and I am always trying to tip it downwards. Well, yesterday I pulled it and the showerhead snapped right off the hose. Since I was also running late yesterday morning, I just left it and went to take a shower in the kid's bathroom. This morning, I had forgotten about it and when I turned the water on the hose was still attached to the holster and aimed at the ceiling. Now everything is wet. And I had to use the kids bathroom again. (At least this time I took the hose down so when I make the same mistake tomorrow I don't drench everything again.)

Anyway, after that I finished getting ready I got in the car and rushed off to work realizing that I was definitely going to be cutting it close making it on time. About a third of the way there I realized I left the cookies I made for today's holiday luncheon in the fridge. (Yes, I baked. All by myself. And I didn't burn the house down in the process. So there!) So I turned the car around and went home to get them. And realized now I was definitely going to be late. Which was probably why when I got into the car I also noticed I was basically running on fumes and needed to stop for gas.

The only gas station between my house and my office is this old 1950s station on this old country road that I take each day. It doesn't take credit cards at the pump and still has those spin dials that show the price, etc. So after I filled the car up, I was heading inside and held the door for this black guy in a winter army coat and a jeans. After walking up to the register, I noticed the old guy at the register (who looked like he had been there since this place opened) was counting some change in his hand. After a second or two he put a couple of quarters into the register and threw the rest of it across the room. When he noticed my quizzical look, he said "F*cking n*gg*rs!!" And when that look didn't leave my face, he said "They all keep their pocket change in their cupholders and spill soda all over it. It's disgusting. I wouldn't have given him his cigar if he gave me that change first." All I could think is what does that have to do with what color he was. The guy looked like a vet. I'd say that made him a good person in my book. Furthermore, I know I've had change in my cupholder before and I'm sure I've spilled some soda in there at one point. Does that make me a bad person too? Sorry your money was a bit sticky. It happens. Get over it. Sometimes people just look for reasons to hate and it amazes me.

Well, I'm at work now. And I was going to fill in one of those other stories from last week but since there was so much this morning you'll have to wait a bit longer.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Catching up

Well, a lot has happened so I'll start off with a cliff-notes version. You'll have to wait for the full story on any of these.

Holiday Shopping - I'm done. No really.

Go-Karts - Both GB and DQ are getting one for Christmas.

Our town Christmas Parade - GB was marching in it with his school band. I have video. It was a long parade. People on the floats threw candy.

Hockey - We played a really fun and hardfought game Sunday night. We lost 10-8. I scored 3 goals for us. I scored 1 goal for them. People teased me for the 1 goal I scored for them.

Dating - Things have been good since I ended things with E. I met someone new that I like a lot. Her name is K. I also met 2 other women who I don't like so much. I have to end things with them now because they are both very into me. (Note: Lots of women is good for the ego, but not so good if I want a relationship with K.)

Company Holiday Party - Quote of the year: Imagine being in a crowded room with 20 of your friends and co-workers and have one of the women yell to you "Hey Joe, we're waiting! Grab her waist, bend her over, and rip her ass a new one!" Yes, there was free alcohol at this party.

Band Concert - GB has a band concert tonight. He has to wear a shirt and tie. I'm going to take videos. I might even share them.

Trans-Siberia Orchestra - I got offered a ticket to go with one of the woman whom I don't like so much. I want to go, but I said no since it would have ended up in sex afterwards. (Note to readers: Sex = good. Guilt of not seeing her again afterwards = bad. I like to think of myself as good.)

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

I'm alive!

Sorry about the inactivity. Been pretty busy both at home and at work. I promise I'll catch you up shortly. But for now, thanks for asking!

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Idiocracy

Has anyone else seen this movie?



It's hilarious, and done with the proper amount of cheesiness. (And if cheesiness isn't a word, it's perfect for this post and this movie.) The premise is that in the future the human race is regressing into a bunch of retards because Darwinism doesn't apply to humans since we have no natural enemies. And without anything to thin the herd, stupid people breed at a much faster rate than intelligent ones (who naturally have less kids and wait for the perfect time and situation) and eventually overrun the world. 500 years from now, the entire population is made up of redneck Jerry Springer rejects with an average IQ of around 50.

This movie isn't going to win any awards, but the concept is brilliant. Go rent it.

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Biden calls out Bush on Iran stance

Bush is yet again raising the specter of World War III with Iran because of its pursuit of a nuclear weapon. Yet Bush knew that our own intelligence community had concluded months earlier that Iran had halted its weapons program in 2003.

This is incredibly stupid and dangerous, and it's exactly what he did in the run up to the war in Iraq in consistently exaggerating intelligence suggesting that Iraq had WMD while failing to tell the American people about intelligence concluding that it did not. War with Iran is not just a bad option, it would be a disaster.

Below is a video clip proving once again that Biden is by far the best choice of either party in regards to foreign policy. Honestly, it's not even close.

Monday, December 3, 2007

Negra Modelo

Friday after work a few of us went out for a drink at a restaurant across the street from the office before heading home. The place is called Bahama Breeze and it's got a Caribbean theme. They have a great outdoor area designed like a pagota with a firepit on one side, tiki torches all the way around, and a guy on the steel drums playing Calypso music on the other. We stopped at the bar to grab a beer before snagging a table. Once we do, our waiter come up and introduces himself. He apologizes in advance, letting us know it is his first day and drops off our menus. He certainly looks the part though. He's a big dark skinned black guy wearing a colorful Hawaiian shirt. We could have easily been sitting on the beach in the Bahamas.

Anyway, he comes by a few minutes later to take our order and ask if we want refills on our beers. Charles and I asked for another Red Stripe, Jason and Rob ordered another Corona, and Terrence held up his bottle and said "Yea, another Negra."

The waiters mouth just dropped. None of us caught what had just happened quite yet - except for Charles. Charles piped right in. "He asked you to run and get him another one, NEGRA!!"

Negra Modelo is a dark mexican beer. Apparantly the waiter not only never heard of it, he thought he had just been seriously insulted.



To clarify, not only is Charles a total wiseass, both he and Terrence are also black. (I don't think it would have been said if they weren't.) After we explained what we were talking about and showing him the bottle, the waiter laughed, then spent the rest of time answering Terrence with "Yessa massa!!! Anything else I can do for you massa??? Thank you, massa!!"

It was a riot, but I guess you had to be there...

Panthers Football

Yesterday, GB and I drove down to Charlotte for the Panthers game. It was the second time in two weeks for me, but it was actually GB's first pro football game ever. A bunch of friends of mine from the Huddle (A Panthers fan club) have a tailgate at every home game so we got up early to head to that. We got to the Stadium at around 8:30am and the tents were already up, the grill was going strong, the music playing loud, and the AV system almost in place. Did I say that this was a serious tailgate? It's complete with 4 large screen plasma TVs, 3 with various sports channels on and the 4th hooked up to a Wii? It's gotten so popular that we have weekly sponsors that provide all the food and non-alcoholic drinks for free in return for flying their logo on our flagpole, or if the sponsor is a car dealer then parking a car in the middle of our tailgate to be ogled.

Breakfast time is always my favorite. We have sausage, egg, and cheese biscuits, bacon, pancakes, etc. and since we are generally the only tailgate there that early we have the rest of the parking lot to play some football. And it's great to see GB's athletic prowess getting much better. He's got a good arm, as good as some of the adults, and his catching has vastly improved. Long gone are the days of throwing the ball to him, watching it bouce off his chest onto the ground, then having go chase the ball since nobody had any idea where it was going to go when he threw it back.

After breakfast and some football, GB went into the AV tent and started playing Wii with a bunch of the guys there. The alcohol was already flowing and so was the energy level. (The unwritten rule is that on Football Sundays the beer starts flowing at 9am, and the hard alcohol and Everclear jello shots at 10am.) Well, since we have a Wii at home, GB is pretty good at the bowling game and blew everyone away the first game he played. This was quite amusing to everyone except the 3 other adults he beat. That's when the betting started. While GB didn't take part monitarily, much to his amusement it didn't stop people from placing $10 bets on him or against him in the upcoming games.

Around 11am the breakfast stuff gets put away and the steaks, burgers, and dogs come out. There isn't anything better than a perfectly seasoned, ultra tender ribeye steak on a hamburger bun, complete with a cold beer and Panther football.

Speaking of Panther Football, the season hasn't been going to well. However, that has it's own benefit. Like free tickets. When your team is having a down year and the team you are playing is also having a down year, there are going to be lots of extra tickets available. Especially good tickets. (ie - the ones purchased by corporations instead of people.) And what generally happens for games like this is that people with the cheap seats (the diehard fans) will buy better seats for virtually nothing from the scalpers, then give their old tickets away. I was all set to scalp a pair of lower level end zone seats for $10 buck a piece myself (normally $84 seats) when one of the guys from the tailgate asked if anyone wanted his old ones for free. So we took 2 of them and another guy took his other 2.

And his seats weren't bad. They were upper deck, row 4, in the corner of one of the end zones. You could clearly see everything from there. We all settled in, but not 5 minutes later I get a text message from a different friend of mine telling me she has 2 extra Club level seats and for us to come down. Those seats were incredible, 2nd row mezzanine on the 30. She said all the people next to her didn't all show up but the ones that did brought their extras with them. So we're in the $170 seats for free. I told GB not to expect that every time.

Anyway, the Panthers won at home for the first time in well over a year and GB has been dubbed a good luck charm. I've been told I have to bring him to every game from now on. After the game, the club level has a nice museum where we took a few photographs there. I'll get those pictures posted she sends them over to me. Overall it was a great day. I'm looking forward to doing this with him on a regular basis.

It's all over now

Don't come around here no more
Don't come around here no more
Whatever you're looking for
Hey! Don't come around here no more

I've given up. I've given up
I've given up on waiting any longer
I've given up, on this love getting stronger

I don't feel you anymore
You darken my door
Whatever you're looking for
Hey, don't come around here no more

- Tom Petty

Well, Toby the dog is back with E, and while I actually grew to like having him around, I'm not likely going to see him again. E was supposed to swing by and pick up the dog when she got back from Miami on Friday evening. Part of the reason she was down there was to load up her van with a bunch of clothes and stuff from her oldest daugher who is going to be moving up here with her. The plan was that when she picked up the dog, I was going to go over to her house with her to help her unload it.

I called her Friday evening for a status update, and she said they were running late driving back into town. Then around 9:30 I get a text message "Home now. Tired. Going to bed." Saturday morning I didn't hear from her right away, so called over there around 9:30 to find out what the plan was. She gave me a rundown of all the stuff she had to do for the day - skate school for one of her daughters, picking up tickets for a show, going grocery shopping, etc. I asked her what time she had to leave to do all that, and she said she needed to be out the door in 30 minutes. So I said, OK fine, I'll keep the dog here until you are done, why don't you swing by and pick him up on your way home. She said "Fine, see you around 2."

2pm comes around, and she shows up at my door with the biggest pissed off look on her face. No hello, no thanks for watching the dog. Just "Do you have his food bowls?" I was taken aback and said "Whoa, what's going on here?" She just glowered at me and said "I haven't eaten, my whole schedule is messed up, I didn't get half of what I wanted to get done finished, I got crappy tickets for the show since I was late. No thanks to you."

Whoa. "Wait a minute, what did I miss here?"

She said "You said you were going to come help me unload, I had to do that all myself. Once again I can't count on you. You couldn't even bring the dog over. I had to come on over and do that too. Some of us do more than sit on the couch in the morning with the kids on the weekends."

Again, whoa.

"What??? Hold on here. First of all, I told you flat out the one condition I had watching your dog was I didn't want to put him in my car. It's still new and has leather seats and I don't want a hyper 80 pound Husky bouncing all over the back. Besides, I can't fit your dog and his crate in my car anyway. That's why you brought him over to me in the first place. Secondly, you didn't tell me you were planning on unloading the back of your van before you did your running around when I talked to you this morning. Third, you know damn well I would have been there in a heartbeat if you asked. I was planning on helping last night, but you changed that part of the schedule. Then I called you this morning to find out what the new schedule was and you gave me your rundown - none of which was needing me over there right away to help unload. If you said 'I need your help before I go' I would have been right over. Fourth, what the hell is this crap about sitting on the couch?"

"You don't listen to me. I needed you there. You knew I was bringing stuff back."

"I knew you were bringing clothes back. Let's replay this for a minute so we're on the same page here. #1 - You didn't call me last night when you got home. You sent me a text message. Unloading last night was the plan, you changed that. #2 - I had no idea what your schedule was today so I CALLED AND ASKED YOU. If this was urgent, or your brought back something I didn't know about, you could have picked up the phone to tell me. Again, when I didn't hear from you, I called to ask what the plan was. #3 - When we talked, you gave me your list of stuff to do. None of the things you listed was still needing help unloading the van so I figured you either unloaded the clothes yourself or it wasn't a top priority and we were going to do it later. All it would have taken was for you to say 'I want your help before I do the rest of this stuff.' and I would have been right over. I'm not a mindreader. Finally, I'll leave the crack about the couch for some other time."

"I do tell you when I need your help, you just don't hear me. You knew I was bringing stuff home and you left it for me to do by myself."

"OK, whatever. I'm so glad that's what you think. I'm happy you made it home safe. Here's your dog. It's been great."

E has this martyr complex. I've always known about it, but figured that it might get better after a while. I was wrong. Something is always going wrong for her - she has random problems all the time - too many errands, kids behavior issues, not enough time, etc. Yet everytime I offer to help, the answer is always the same "There's nothing you can do." or "My kids have issues, you wouldn't understand." (Her kids are fine, great kids actually - they just do kid stuff like every other kid in the world.) Yet if something like this happens, and if in her eyes I don't help, or offer to help, then I've let her down. And since I've apparantly let her down, I deserve to be verbally abused for this failure on my part.

I'm done. I'm not going to be with someone who thinks it's OK to treat people like that. So, that means I guess I just saved a bunch of money on Christmas gifts this year. But it's also going to be a Christmas spent alone. Any of you out there have single sisters? Are you single? Have single friends? :)